Pressure is all around us. Air pressure is a force we are usually not aware of. We face pressure from deadlines at work or at school or pressure from our parents to finally give them grandkids. While pressure is a natural part of life, it’s important to remember the harmful effects of pressure as well.
Too much air pressure can be harmful and cause sickness, and too much pressure at work can create stress that sticks with us even when we are not working. Pressure from your parents can cause resentment, too. So how do you ensure that pressure doesn’t negatively impact your relationship?
Recognize good pressure
Pressure can motivate you to finish what you need to get done. With gentle reminders, your partner can help you remember to finally fix that bookshelf that you’ve been meaning to repair. A little bit of pressure in a massage is the perfect way to relax and get your muscles the attention they need.
When there is pressure, it means something is important. If there was no pressure, then it wouldn’t be worth focusing on. Good pressure reminds you that it’s something you should be paying attention to.
Don’t avoid it
It can be tempting to avoid pressure. No one likes feeling uncomfortable, which is why you may find yourself attempting to avoid it altogether. But if you avoided pressure, you would never leave the house, take risks, or experience the truly beautiful things in life.
You might feel pressure when partnering with a matchmaker or when going on a date, but plenty of people would tell you that avoiding these just because they might be uncomfortable would be a mistake. Dates are stressful and uncomfortable, but even if you don’t end up spending the rest of your life with someone, you’ll end up learning about yourself and what works for you.
Understand the cause
Instead of avoiding pressure, try to figure out why something causes pressure in the first place. If you feel pressure from your family to have kids, understand where they are coming from. Are they asking just to ask, or do they have expectations for you?
When you understand the causes of pressure in your relationship, you can help make the pressure a little more bearable. If your mother-in-law, for example, keeps asking you about you having kids, it might be because she assumes that you and your partner are having kids – even if that’s something the two of you have decided against.
Acknowledge when it’s too much
If being asked about something in your relationship, like having kids, is putting too much pressure, then it’s important to acknowledge it. Otherwise, the pressure may build up until you do something you’ll regret, or it takes a toll on your relationship. So, be honest. Don’t wait until the pressure makes you blow up. Slowly releasing the pressure is the best way to ensure that you are handling everything in a healthy way – and in a way that benefits you and your relationship.